A boast in faith?

After my lesson, I was energetic. I couldn't wait to start down the new path God has for me. I've been here before and it didn't end with me following the path. The thought of when did my faith become so weak. Dear Lord, give me faith to follow you.

That prayer sounds good right. I was reading my long list of blogs and I found one that convicted me, because of my lack of faith. This blog post gave me a new view. Instead of looking up, I have started looking around, and I see that God has given me enough faith to do what He has called me to do.

In reality my faith is not at all what stops me from walking that path. It is fear. Fear that has attached itself to me. What is even worse is that I have even caught myself feeding the fear with lies. Isn't that what fear is anyway. The Bible tells us that perfect love casts out fear. The only perfect love comes from God. So when I am not following God down this new path, I'm standing maybe even living in that lie.

The faith chapter, Hebrews 11, tells of people who used their faith to step out of the boat, to take the path God had for them. They were commended for this. Jesus told a parable about the two sons, found in Matthew 21:28-32. 

In this parable the father asked both sons to go work in the fields for him. The first said no, but changed his mind and went. The second said yes, but then changed his mind and never went. I would like to say I'm standing and haven't answered. That would be nice, but I have told God yes, I will go. But I'm standing here still thinking about it.

The problem is the longer I think about the path, the longer I stand here in fear, the bigger the chance I'm going to be the second son. I don't want to be the second son, I want to be commended for my faith. I want to be an example to those who are hearing the same lies. I want them to say, if God can heal her, if he can use her, if he can help her overcome the lies, then he will do the same for me. I want God to use me to free those around me.

Dear Lord, You have given me the faith I need to overcome the lies, and to fight off the fear. Give me another opportunity to step out in faith. Use me to free those around me who have been lied to as well. Give them freedom from seeing me move. In Jesus Name, Amen